Its interesting at end of semesters, everyone in the last class of the teaching period are generally very pleasant and the tutors are nice and the lecturers like to wind things up early. It sorta lulls you into this false sense of security of everything is gonna turn out alright....

Then WHAM, exams come along and knock you around a bit, making you think you shoulda studied harder.

Well this semester I am definently going to study harder..

Man why can't i spell definently right? Never have, probably never will.

Anyway went to my sisters for dinner tonight, ever since she moved away meeting up always seems like such a huge ordeal. But things went off ok, no dramas just talking and watching the simpsons and red thai curry. Everyone over there kept asking me what I am going to do with my holidays, suggesting I get a job or something. Why do people (ie. working people) always suggest to uni students to get jobs over summer break? Why don't they ever say "Man I wish I was in uni so I could get massive 3 month breaks, you know what? You should enjoy them! Do what you want, or do nothing at all! Its up to you! Have a great time!". I guess its cause they are use to working and to them to have a 3 month break would drive them crazy and broke or something. Well that it does to me as well, but you know, I cope with that.

Anyway there is no point to that ramble, who knows, I might get a job, lets just wait and see.

too, many, commas, ....

Anyway erm, look over there!!!!! *Runs off to bed*

So yeah, scrap that shit I was speaking before about a major in accounting cause I have filled out my form and it looks like I'll be doing a major in finance and a minor in business law. Most of my school colleages think they are both a waste of time as they don't lead to any "real" qualifications, but I am interested in them and by fuck if I am gonna do more schooling I am not interested in, in an attempt to impress some would-be employer for a job I don't want.

So what else is news? Nothing really, been buying lots of crap things I don't need like atari lynx games and megadrive consoles, Astro says its better that I collect these sort of things than say, child pr0n. I tend to agree.

So like I have completely finished 1 of my 5 subjects for this semester and passed it. Huzzah. now I only have 4 exams to do over the next 4 weeks and then I can have some sorta weird summer break that will feel like forever and a glimmer of time all at once. I have no idea what I will do with the time, I have work to do for my old man that I will be forced to do but its stuff I should have done ages ago for him so i shouldn't complain. I'm toying with the idea of getting some decent full time work somewhere but then that fucks with centrelink and I really don't want that, I've hardly heard a peep from them all year (I've had like 3 or 4 letters max) so I don't want to "rock the boat".

Thats all for now.

So yeah, I'm probably gonna do my major accounting/ minor finance and finish the IT minor that I also can do in Database. Joy.

I feel so wound up lately. I dunno what it is, maybe its like how astro felt when she was nearing the end of her course, she felt really restless and a little depressed some times. I feel like that, however I think I feel it more often. I just need a change, a few changes in my life might go down well. I need to start doing crap that I like again, can anyone remember when that liked doing other stuff instead of studying and computers all the time? I mean lately and when I say lately I mean at least the last two years I spend a lot of my time studying and then the rest of the time procrastinating on my computer by either playing games or listening to music or just sitting around staring at shit. And yeah, I know that can be included in "relaxation" time, but really, I just spend hours and hours a day not doing anything worthwhile really, I've been doing it for ages and its shitting me.

I use to be able to tell myself that I'll just get out of it when I want, however I'm starting to think I am "breaking the back" of that train of thought, so to speak. I feel like im slowly slipping away into this hole which is the "rest of my life", and I'm not sure I like it. Hell I'm not even sure what it actually is! And if I did know what it was I wanted to escape from I have no idea what I want to escape to! It is really a strange state I am in.

Anyway, I've got a few assignments to do before Monday and Tuesday next week and then its the last week of classes before the exam period. So I guess I won't be able to sit around on my arse and contemplate things like I have been the last few weeks as I'll be stressing my hardest to not fail everything for another semester.

Meanwhile, I have to stop buying shit off ebay.

huuhhhhhh, Sitting around trying to decide what major I am going to complete for uni. I thought I had it all set out from the start but my mind is changing. When I think about what sort of job I would like after uni I am not sure where any of these degrees really fit in. Then again saying that I still really don't know what sort of job I will want straight out of uni, I've always looked further ahead to jobs that I would like to have rather than where I will start. hrm.

Basically it has come down to me doing an Accounting major or a Finance major. Now I know most people probably think they are the same thing, and while they do have similar subjects, there is differences. Accounting seems the more boring option, and I think it is boring going from what these subject guides tell me. But there seems to be more work out there for accounting skills (not just being an accountant, I don't think I could handle doing that for too long), and also you can go on to do things like CPA and other CPA like qualifications which can really help you move around industries and have a lot of freedom with what you do (and yes, there is more to a CPA than becoming a public accountant).
Finance on the other hand is a bit more interesting to me, you do a lot of subjects in fiscal and monetary policy from an Australian perspective and abroad and a whole other bunch of stuff which can actually be pretty cool to learn and doing an finance major really is an extension of a economics minor. However leaving uni with a finance major, i think I would find that my transferrable skills from this major will be limited as compared to an accounting major and also I think it is easier to jump from accounting to finance instead of finance to accounting skill wise, well I have been told this.

Sigh, what to do... All signs point to me picking accounting in my mind, even though from the start I wanted to do finance, I really can see the benefits of an accounting major. However all I can think about when I go to select my subjects to do the accounting major is this future picture of me sitting in some sterile office in from of a computer all day, fucking with excel for a measly pay check and no incentive to do anything. That frightens the shit outta me.

Other news, my test I talked about last post went really badly, worst mark I've got in uni on any test, still even though it was the worse I walked out of the test thinking I could have got ZERO, so I am happy I got the "good scenario" marks and that I have the ability to recover from this on my final exam to get a decent mark.

Fucking blogger ate my balls last night. I thought it had published what I had written before I went to bed but noooo, it didn't. So now you get two posts today, good for you.

It's 1am, I feel weird in my head. Had a nap before and ever since I woke I've been studying for this Macroeconomics test I have tomorrow. Its fucking balls, this stuff can be very confusing when it shouldn't be, I swear I had a far more sound understanding of how the foreign exchange market, Inflation and Balance of Payments worked before I started this subject. My test is at 9:30am in the morning and I am sitting here reading and this shit is just not sticking, I hope when I wake up later today that I will know at least half of the shit for this test so I can pass cause this is just GAAAY!
I've had a stupid week, I've been staying up all through the night every night since Sunday to get assignments and speeches and all sorts of things ready to be handed in on their due date, which is always the morning after I start them. I dunno whats been happening to my motivation, I guess it always just gets shot dead about 1 months before I finish any semester.
So yeah, this is disjointed isn't it? Fuck I feel tired, this is balls, I am going to go read in bed and stress myself out.

Hmmm its 3am and I should be asleep. My sleeping patterns have gone hella gay lately, I guess this always happens towards end of semester for me.
Its the first real hot night for Spring, I wish I didn't have so much homework to do, I wish my room was cleaner, I wish things that I try to learn as hobbies weren't so god damn hard :) , I wish I was sitting somewhere with Astro drinking coronas and talking about crap. I wish I would hurry up and install Soulseek. I wish I will not be really tired after tomorrows school to study for my test Thursday. I wish it was Friday already. I wish I hadn't put my fan in the garage a few months ago now. I wish I could magically make my fan appear. I wish I was drinking something from Feeling Fruity right now. I wish I didn't have a website to finish first thing summer holidays. I wish I had a decent job for summer holidays. I wish I could just travel around for the summer holidays. I wish boners would rain from the sky right now. I wish everyone I know is right now having pleasant dreams.

[23:32] man I am loving these Deep Space Radio recordings
[23:33] i wish it was <1994 and I was living in Detroit
[23:33] sure there would be no jobs
[23:34] and its depressing
[23:34] but at least I would get good radio

This sums me up today.

Hmmm getting towards the end of semester for school and I got a fair bit due next week. When it comes to the end of each semester I become a bit of a zombie, I sit at my computer desperately trying to think of other shit I should do instead of study/assignments. I succeed about 95% of the time too, I do so much boring crap on the computer you wouldn't believe. I also surf ebay a lot and check blogs and the weather about 10 times an hour. Sad? Maybe.
Speaking of ebay I am bidding on a lot of shit lately, and instead of my usual chickening out when it comes to the crunch I won an auction for some Atari Lynx gear, so now when this stuff arrives (without trouble hopefully) I can distract myself with ripping some vintage handheld gaming systems apart and trying to do some minor repairs to some of my other lynx gear.
Hmmm more writing soon.